Mysterious Pull
by floating-pickle
Summary: Abbie is the daughter of one of Paddy's friends. When she meets Tommy before Sparta she knows something is not quite right with him. Through a dark and sometimes dangerous romance she finds out why this beautiful man is such a beast. WARNING: Triggers! This story is off of my Tumblr so some of you may have read the first parts already.
1. Chapter 1

April 4th

It's cold outside; strangely in fact, for the time of year. But that's not what is bothering me, the fact that I'm walking the quarter mile at 8:30 pm to run a personal errand for my mother is the problem. To make it worse I'm doing it at Paddy Conlon's house. Not that I have anything personal about the old man, but isn't the point of AA that you don't have to run homemade lasagna over for times like this. I am unfortunately the loophole, being that I am not an alcoholic so I am not part of the group, I help set up and take down that is all. So here I stand at 8:45 on my Friday night because Paddy's house was _"Only on the other side of the mount"_. I really hope it's not to late to be ringing the doorbell how early do sixty year olds go to bed anyway. "Coming, hold your horses. Oh! Abbie, to what do I owe this pleasure sweetheart." "My mom made you lasagna for you and your son umm" "Tommy" "Yea, Tommy" He opens the door all the way so I assume I'm stuck going in at least for a little. It's not bad actually defiantly a single mans house, but not uninviting. "Tommy come and meet Abbie, her mom runs my meetings." Oh boy, now I get to meet the wonder-son I was hoping to get away without this. "Old man, I already told you I don' give two shits bout you or your stupid fuck'n meetings." "Tommy she brought us a lasagna don't be rude." Well this isn't awkward at all. "Really Paddy it's okay he doesn't have to.." "Hi, I'm Tommy. There you happy ya old nag?" Well this is unexpected, wonder-son is kinda hot, like fucking hot. "Uh, hey. I'm Abbie it's nice to meet you." Dear lord I would do bad things with this man, "So are you sober too? Praising Jesus and living the right way with my Saintly Father here." "No, I just help with the meeting I'm not sober, I've never had problems with alcohol. I believe it's just a matter of knowing your own limit." This is not going to end well. "Ahh gotcha, so you are one of dem Jesus freaks then, keeping yourself away from booze and lusty situations." "Actually I do try not to mix my drinking with my sexual relations but it has nothing to do with Jesus." Wonder-son is really quite the tool. "Oh yea why bother then?" "Most of the men I know would rather there partner be lucid when they are together, they aren't trying to cover up poor sexual talent with _booze_." Oh shit maybe I should have left that alone, "Who do you think your talk'n to little girl, you want sexual talent I'll…" "Tommy, control yourself for god sake. Abbie dear tell you mother thank you for the lasagna have a good night." "Yea, night Paddy." God am I glad to be walking away from this messed up family.

That was a work out well worth waiting for. I'm glad I decided to after the meeting instead of just staying home, laziness is not next to sexiness after all. "Ey' you, uhh, Abbie." Who in the hell is that, oh fuck me. "Hi there, it's Tommy right" 'Don't act like you don't you dunno who I am. You know damn well little girl." This is going well already, "Look Tommy obviously we got off on the wrong foot the other night and I really am.." "Yea what kinda gal are you anyway? Trashing on a guys prowess before you know a damn thing bout him or his libido." I don't think I'm winning this one. "I realize what I said was out of line, I am sorry." "Yea I'm sure you are, everyone's real sorry." Up close it's really hard to ignore how striking wonder-son really is. Eye's with more stories than they're willing to tell, a chaw chiseled out of what I'm sure have been years of scowling, and that mouth. Every word he is saying I'm taking in but only as much as I'm watching them roll off of the tip of his tongue out of that set of lips. "Hello, earth to broad, do you honestly believe my father is any better than he was fourteen years ago? People don't change like that, he never has and never will." "Well I mean how bad could he really have been." Geez, this guy has a serious sore spot. "What! He hasn't even told all his new Jesus loving, ever excepting, pure as the re-driven snow, friends the truth about himself. Ha not surprised at all. If ya'll knew, naw fuck it, I'll tell you right now." This ought to be exciting. "Look Tommy, Paddy's personal life is his business." "Yea it's mine too, so you can't even tell me I have no right to tell ya." "Okay, if it'll make you feel better Riordan, by the way are you gonna tell me why you go by Riordan." "No, that's none of you goddamned business. But Paddy that story I'll tell you happily. When I was a kid Paddy drank a lot, and when Paddy drank he got violent. So violent in fact that he put my mom in the hospital, more than once. Him and Brendan, I'm sure you've heard of him.." "Yea he sounds pretty cool." "Brendan is no better than Paddy a waste of time. Anyway, him and Brendan weren't close, not like him and me. I was his machine, he had me training almost more than doing my school shit. But that much I'm sure you knew." Nodding, Paddy loves to brag about his wonder-son, "Yea, well'd he tell ya what would happen if I lost huh? No, yea I lost he drank, more than normal and more drinking meant bigger fights, bigger fights meant bigger bruises. My ma never stood a chance when he got going. Fourteen years I watched him get to messed up and take it all out on her face," Why is he telling me all of this, I don't even know him.

"Tommy I'm sorry that happened to you but Paddy, he's dif.." "Yea different I've been told, thanks. After I turned fourteen I was going undefeated, I thought everything should be going okay, but naw, course not with good ol' Paddy. It was never enough. One night I tell him to fuck off, say I'm done with it all. He comes after me, Brendan tried to get in the way, Paddy knocked him out. My mom step up told him to back off, he punched her straight in the jaw, no mercy. I snapped jumped on him, put him in a joke hold till he passed out. That was the night we made the plan, me, my mom, and Brendan were gonna leave, take off for the west coast." I can see my house but part of me wants to cut up a few streets just to get a little more story, I'm sure he wouldn't notice. "Day we were suppose to leave Brendan was no where to be found. I headed to his girls house, Tess, and there he was. Asking for me to understand saying he was in love, like that made it okay for him to break his word. But either way, that's that. Decent, sober Paddy, picture of recovery, is really a monster. How do you feel bout him now little girl." The first time it was hot, the second I dealt with it, but I swear if he calls me _"Little girl"_ one more time he is getting hit. "Everyone fucks up Tommy, you just have to learn to move on and forgive. I mean he is doing you a big favor, training you for this thing. You should consider your karma in all this. I can grantee you don't want it getting any worse so maybe you should throw a little give in with all your take." "What da hell are you talking about li.." "Come to the meeting next Sunday, all he wants is for you to see him trying. Just come." He looks like he could eat my soul right now, why am I standing here waiting for him to lose it. "Yea, right do him a favor, ha. You're a laugh girlie you really are." "Alright well this is me Tommy, thanks for walking me home I guess. I hope I see you Sunday." What now, he is just staring at me. Am I supposed to do something I mean he just told me some pretty personal stuff. "Eh, maybe well don't get to thinking anything, I didn't intend on walking you to your door step." He is super affectionate huh, glad he isn't my problem. "G'bye Tommy."

I wonder if he came, it sounded like he was going come but I have a feeling he is not someone I should take on his tone of voice. "Abbie! Hey, Abbie over here." "Hey Paddy what's wrong." I don't see him with Paddy guess he dipped out. "Nothing is wrong, Tommy came! He mumbled something about you and karma then got in the car. I just wanted to say thank you." "Oh, well your welcome but he's not here because of me Paddy. Uhh, were is he?" This guy must be the worlds largest ninja. "He is in the corner over there, hiding. He said he is here to listen and watch. He doesn't want to speak or be spoken to." Sounds about right, "Have a good meeting Paddy." Sweats again, he never wears real clothes. "You came." "Yep." Okay then. "What changed you mind?" "Don't need the risk." Wow someone is in a great mood. "How's your training going?" "Wha.. Look girlie," beats little girl I guess, "we aren't friends. That talk da other day wasn't me makin nice, I was proving a point. So go bother some who wants you around k'." "God, your such a douche bag." I am never talking to that jag off again.

Okay three seconds then you're out of there. We shouldn't even be doing this there is no good ending. Walking into Coldts and out of the cold is a shock to my nerves in more ways than one. The smell, not like the health club which smells clean with just a hint of human odor underneath the intense smell of yoga mats and cleaning product, but pure sweat. This isn't a gym that is here to gather clients, these men are serious trainers. Now which one is the one I'm looking for? There he is, off in the corner, no surprise. God look at him, he is like a force of nature going at that poor mannequin. His shoulders are imposing and inviting all at once, it's the look on his face that tells you they're there for use and not for show. He isn't built like that for anyone's benefit but his own. "Hey lady, if you just gonna stand there and watch you need to leave, this isn't lady porns' r' us." "Uh, um, I'm sorry I'll go." I don't see Tommy anymore where'd he go? "Abbie, what are you doing here." Crap. "Hi, Tommy. I was just, erm, uhhh, you know hanging out." What is that look in his eye, now I know I shouldn't be here, "Don't move." "Why?" "Just don't" Something is up with him, god I hope he isn't going to flip out on me, he wasn't supposed to know I came. It was suppose to be clean in and out. "Come on girlie."

He's not saying anything. We've been walking nearly twenty minutes and he hasn't said a word. "What exactly is going on Tommy, where are we going." "Paddy's." "Why are we going to Paddy's." No response, as long as he isn't taking me there to get me inside then give me the what for. Though I have a sneaking suspicion that's not what he has in mind. "Come on." "Why are we going inside Tommy, what is going on." His eye's say it all; _don't play dumb little girl, _they're practically screaming it at me. I have never been more excited or afraid in my life than walking up these stairs. Why isn't he saying anything, why wont act like a normal person for just one second. "Sweet Jesus you sleep in a glorified closet." The room is no where near large enough for him, nor is the bed sitting just to the left of us. "Shut up." "Excuse me." "I don't want to talk to you anymore." "You weren't saying anything in the first place." His lips are grazing the nape of my neck, while his hands are spread out across my back. He is pulling me closer as he kisses his way up my neck towards my ear, not leaving an inch untouched. I move so that I am now facing him directly, as I try to kiss him he pushes me back. His eyes are cold, nearly empty, suddenly the fear is back.

He has grabbed my hoodie and is unzipping the front, he leaves it for me to remove while he takes of his shirts. I don't get a chance to enjoy the view though because now I am on my back under him. His lips are on my neck again moving like clock work up to my ear lobe, he nips it a little, then down to my collar bone where his bite is less gentle. My pants are off before I realize what is happening. I didn't even see him remove his but he is in me before I have a chance to adjust.

Moving quickly and with a purpose, grunting and growling, I'm having sex with an animal not a person. God it hurts, I can't even enjoy it. "Tommy slow down, or at least ease up, your hurting me." A lower meaner growl that's all I can hear, but he has sort of slowed. It actually feels good now, great even. His right hand in on my thigh holding it up and close to him, grasping to hard, I'm going to bruise for sure. His left is in my hair holding my head where he wants it as he continues his attack on my neck. I'm surprised by how good it all feels, but I feel sickened at the same time by the lack of connection. He has shifted me, placed me more directly under him, I can feel all of him now, working in then back out. He really wasn't wrong to defend his prowess; even through everything that's wrong with this, it all feels amazing. I can feel the pressure building as I'm digging my nails deeper into the flesh of his shoulders. Just a little longer and I'll cum despite it all, now he is shuttering on top of me. Letting out a deep harsh groan he finishes with me right on the edge. He had to have known I was close, it's not like I was hiding it.

He just rolled off. No words not even a look in the eyes, just off. I'm fighting tears as I put my cloths back on and walk out. I see Paddy pulling around the corner so I'm trying to hurry, even though it hurts. Even though I can barley see through my tears. I'm going home, and I'm never coming back here again.


	2. Chapter 2

April 20th

I don't know why I let it happen. In all honesty I'm still not even positive what it was. Except wrong… it was defiantly wrong.

It's been a week and a half since what happened with Tommy. I skipped the meeting that week trying not to see him. I guess he never showed up anyways. But on that night a week ago today, Mike showed up. I hadn't expected to see him standing there. Especially not after how it ended last time. My mother maybe, finding out why I missed the meeting or one of her concerned friends. I was terrified it might even be Tommy. But no to my shock and joy surprisingly, it was Mike. We talked things over a bit decided maybe if we let go of the childish things we held onto from the last few times maybe, just maybe, we could make it work.

Today he came to the meeting with me. He didn't ask why I needed him there just said yes. That's what was great about Mike. No excitement or mystery he was just there. My mom had talked me into starting the meeting since I had apparently upset a few people by missing last week. It was Paddy Conlon's one thousandth day, I wanted to go but if Tommy had been there I don't think I could've made it in the door. Not after what happened after how he had made me feel. But this week I was here and to make it up to Paddy I was going to use my forced turn to re-congratulate him. "Hello everybody, I know I don't normally talk but I wanted to start the meeting today so I could apologize for missing Paddy's celebration last week. A thousand days is a milestone not many reach, we are all very proud of you Paddy, way to go." At that point I allowed myself to look in his direction for the first time while the crowed gave a round of applause. No Tommy. I was safe or so it seemed. "I missed last week due to a trying personal issue. I did something out of character for myself and was dealing with the emotional repercussions of that. Thank you for your understanding everyone." As I walked off the stage they all began clapping. I looked around making the necessary slightly obligatory eye contact. That's when I saw him. Tucked back into his corner staring at me like an un-caged tiger. I couldn't stay and live under his watch so I told Mike I was going to go start setting up the food in the basement for after the prayer session. I waited until I saw Tommy head over for a refill of his coffee cup then snuck out hoping I went unnoticed.

I was setting out the plates for the sloppy Joe's mom would be providing to the members once the meeting was done when suddenly I knew he was there. "Ashamed of foolin round with Saint Paddy's messed up son huh?" My whole body shook, partly from fear. Mostly from something else I wasn't totally ready to deal with yet. "That's not what I said Tommy. Why are you down here?" He was directly behind me now. But I hadn't worked up the nerve to face him yet the fear of those heated eyes was to much to bare. "Who's that, with you up there?" t took me a moment to figure out who me ment. "That would be Mike, we are on and off and as of last Sunday we decided to try on again." I turned finally seeing exactly what I expected. Tommy stone faced about six inches in front of me looking like he was ready to pounce. "As of last Sunday, that was two days after, what about.." The utter confusion in his tone had me at a loss. "What about what Tommy. Your twisted little mind game the other night?" That was the trigger. He was pacing now in a three foot line back and forth, closer to prowling than a pace even. "Girlie I never played you for a second. It was all straight up." I couldn't believe what I was hearing, straight up, no fucking way. "So you don't kiss anyone you sleep with, it had nothing to do with proving a point?" At this he stopped his prowl and walked back to his earlier position encompassing my personal space. "I did kiss you Abbie. In fact I member paying certain tension to right bout.." He ran the back of his index finger over my collar bone. The contact making every nerve in my body explode into a revolution against my; until that point, very aware fight or flight instinct. "No Tommy I mean real kissing, as in on my lips." A smile grew on his face as soon as the words were out. Like I had just said exactly what he had been hoping for. "Oh! Well excuse me darlin'. Didn't realize I had forgotten bout dem." He came closer to me, grabbing me by the waste as I tried to back away. "What are you doing?" His hands ran slowly up the back of my shirt over my skin. Breath hot and moist on my ear. "Giving you your kiss." He picked me up setting me on the table I had backed myself into trying to get away, but instead of kissing me he started kneeling to the ground. "What the hell are you doing exactly?" Now removing his stocking cap he looked me straight in the eyes, "I already told you, giving you your damn kiss." His hands slid menacingly up my outer thighs reaching my cotton bikini panties, without pause he slipped his finger tips under the strap. But before he could pull them down I protested. "Tommy this is wrong you need to stop." His immediate response was merely a chuckle followed by the feeling of his lips, wet and soft, against my inner thigh. "Shhhhhh no more out of you, your only getting what you wanted."

I should have told him to stop. I know that, but I didn't. He continued kissing my inner thighs, making circles with the tip of his tongue up and down the length of either side. Finally he finished what he had started earlier and pulled off my cotton shield. "Tommy I really don…" I had no chance to finish my thought before I felt the heat of his breath on my center. His hands touched me first, one finger making it's way up either side while a third rubbed along the middle, finding with the tip my jewel. I let out a moan. Half afraid he would stop but he sounded back with a growl, almost possessive in tone. Slowly he worked his hand up and down my folds getting the centered finger moist, then he slid it inside me as I let out another cry of gratitude. Finally after a moment or so with no movement he lowered his head back to where he had held it before and with just the tip of his tongue grazed my mark. My whole body ached. I needed more, but asking for it would only lead to some kind of unpleasant retort.

Suddenly from outside the room I could hear footsteps on the staircase. 'Tommy, uhh, someone is coming." "Mmmhhhhhggg," was all the gave back, he showed no signs of slowing and as the footsteps drew nearer I realized again how what I was doing was wrong. I wish now that I had stopped him but I was already in the hole so I figured there was no point. The foot steps turned the hall and I felt relief, _just headed to the bathroom, _I thought to myself. He must have known my mind was slipping because just as I was losing myself in thought he slipped another finger inside of me, picking up speed in his motions. He wasn't teasing any longer. No more tip no more on edge, he was lapping at my bud without restraint. I tried to stay quite. To hold back in order to prevent attracting those footsteps on the way back up the stairs, but I couldn't. Tommy was doing everything right, it was like the other night had vanished and all that mattered was my pleasure. The idea of being caught mixed with the vision of Tommy Conlon(Riordan whatever) on his knees for me was about all I could stand, alongside the feeling of his devouring me. Then he let out another growl, this one expressing pleasure derived from the deed at hand and I couldn't wait any longer. My whole body broke into spasms rocking me to my core as I feel back onto the table to avoid falling forward onto the bringer of my momentary nirvana.

Tommy stood then wiping his mouth on the inside of his shirt collar and before the previous moment even could be taken into perspective he reminded me who I was dealing with, "See der you got your damn'd kiss." I almost couldn't believe it, almost. I got off the table, placing my panties back where they belonged and fluffing my skirt until it looked as it should then I began to walk towards the kitchen. I was done. No more of this bullshit. "Where the hell are you runnin off to?" His tone was serious. We hadn't finished what he'd started. "To do what I'm suppose to be doing." He marched after me grabbing me by the wrist. "Did I miss something, cuz I thought we as in the midst of getting somewhere." Had he honestly thought that would work? "No Tommy you were in the midst I was done. Sucks don't it." I knew as soon as it came out I was going to regret it. Fire filled his eyes as he lifted me up and over his shoulder. "Put me the fuck down you Jag-off. I swear to god I will bite the shit out of you." A laugh rumbled through his chest and in to my body. "Go ahead and try little girl see where it gets you." That's was all I was going to take. I clenched my fists together into a ball and slammed them as hard as I could into his back. He stopped in his track and put me back on my feet. "What in the fuck is wrong with you broad." My eye must have been the size of plates just then. "Wrong with me, ME! Your like a robot with a six pack. You show no sign off emotion unless it's horny or pissed. You need fucking help." Possibly the most unnerving part of the day followed that. Tommy grabbed my face on either side and kissed me. It was more like being punched with his face on my lips. He pressed his mouth to mine forcing my lips open and jammed his tongue into my mouth. Keeping one had clasped to my bottom jaw and the other digging into my hair. After what felt like a life time he let me go. "You need to go back upstairs Tommy, if Mikes comes down here... You've already done to much." He looked like a wild man. The features of his face twisted into a raged mask. "I've already let you do to much." This was obviously not the reaction he had been waiting for, "What you'd rather be with him then? That runt up there, that boy?" I wasn't prepared for him to show this kind of reaction. I did nothing to restrain my thoughts from flowing out of my mouth. "He is a year older than I am and I don't make habit out of having fucked up sexual relations with assholes in their late twenties."

I turned again and walked away from him this time reaching the small church kitchen and slamming the door behind me. I wasn't surprised to hear it open back up I wasn't even surprised when he picked me up and set me on the island in the middle of the kitchen where the electric crock pot sat waiting to be cleaned from heating up the meat now sitting ready to eat just across the hall. What surprised me was how soft his voice was then "I'm not so terrible Abbie." He laced his fingers through the back of my hair and pulled my head back to kiss up my neck till he reached my chin then gently grab it between his teeth before he released me. I thought then for a second that I might be able to leave; that if I told him I couldn't do this, if I looked him in the eye and told him I wanted to leave he would allow it. "Tommy we are not doing this. Mike and the rest of the meeting will be down here any minute." I was wrong. He leaned forward almost as if he planned on kissing me again but instead he ran his nose along the side of my cheek till his lips were at my ear. "Best keep it down then girlie." I was helpless completely torn between was I should do and what I knew I was going to do.

To my amazement Tommy was less of the beast I had encountered days ago. He kissed my cheek pecking his way down to my neck getting into the same pattern I remembered from the last time. Up to my earlobe which was greeted with a gentle nibble, then down to the nape where he sank his teeth in a bit more thoroughly. He lifted off my shirt massaging my breast through my bra as he kissed and bit the newly reachable areas on my shoulder giving them equal treatment. I wasn't quite sure what was expected of me so I waited knowing he would make it clear when the time came. Feeling his tongue dance over the exposed portions of my chest I let out a sigh. He reacted then as if he had forgotten he was touching a living breathing being. "You jus gonna sit der then? I mean you've been awfully selfish with all this don't you think." My mouth dropped open, was he being serious? As if I had asked for anything he had done. As if I had intended it. "Well I mean if that's what you want to do fine, but I wasn't going there with it." The cocky expression on his face made me wish I had the nuts to smack him. "Excuse me?" I was to blindsided to know what he was saying. "Well your sitting with ya mouth open like your waitin fer me to put something in it." I clamped my jaw shut making it clear I had no intensions of doing him that favor. "Alright, alright like I said I wasn't goin there wit it." He took hold of my right hand then. They had both been grasping at the edge of the counter top so tightly my knuckles were completely white. He lifted my hand to my face placed my palm in front of my mouth. "Lick it." I retracted from my appendage with mild disgust. "What!?" His face never changed. Smug and positive he was going to get what he wanted. "Well your not dry rubbin it. Now lick it." So I did. To my own horror I just obeyed. Then before he could grab the wrist again I did what he was leading me towards. I slid my hand under the hem of his sweats and into his athletic shorts within. I found his erection there full and ready. It twitched when I wrapped my hand around it at the base. Working my way down then back up I stroked him while he went on biting and licking, playing more roughly with my breast. I stroked him down all the way to the cherry and let my finger tips graze it just barley for a moment or two. "MMhhhmm, that's it girlie, just like that." His encouragement only added to the growing frustrations I was feeling in my currently ignored places. But he had after all just paid them his full attention. I scooted up the counter getting myself pressed against him as tightly as I could. Trying to give my arm more lag so I could increase my speed. Caressing his manhood firmly as I moved my way from his nether curls to the tip. Suddenly he stopped me mind motion. "Enough Abbie, your not getting off that easy." He scooted me back where he'd placed me to begin with dropping his pants to the ground and reaching once again for my undergarments. I took a deep breath as he pulled them away. Growing more and more uneasy of what may follow everything that just happened. Would it be like last time or would he remain in this slightly more docile place. He placed his hands under my thighs and set himself between my legs thrusting into me with one powerful movement. I was fearful that I had my answer.

He stayed there for a moment not moving. I'm still not sure why. But then he began his assault, hammering in and out of me with vicious speed. I had expected this the pain again. Except with it this time was more pleasure the position lent itself to my favor. With every plunge Tommy rub against my clit. I let out a deep groan forgetting the dangerous place we were located. "Shhh, don't want your boy toy showing up now do we, that could ruin it all." He licked the end of his wet tongue leisurely along the line of my collar after he spoke. The thought of hurting Mike in that way brought to me all of the sickness my ecstasy had been keeping at bay. To silence myself better I dug my teeth into his chest taking out the majority of my reaction on him. He growled in my ear. Beating in to me harder still. It felt as though he were bordering on wounding me. I wrapped my hands around the middle of his waist and drove my nails into his back trying to regain control of myself. He lifted me up in the air. Holding me by my waist and working me up and down himself. The feeling of him entering me completely lasted only a few moments before we both rang out slightly muffed cries of climax. Tommy set me on my feet unusually careful that I had my bearings before he released his grip. then we went about rearranging ourselves back to what we had been before.

I saw my reflection in a small mirror above the stove, hair disheveled, lips swollen from biting down on them in those last seconds. There was nothing I could do to stop the guilt from finding its way to the surface and I began to cry. More obviously than I had thought because next thing I new Tommy was beside me again. "What, why are you cryin? You Can't say I hurt you cuz those weren't no sounds of pain comin out your mouth a minute ago." He had no idea, it didn't even occur to him that I was feeling guilty. "No, I'm not in pain. I'm mortified, I just cheated on my boyfriend you do realize that right." I was sobbing now trying to keep silent in hopes that the now audible group across the hall wouldn't walk in on the scene. "Yea I know, but I don't see where all this is helping." I put my face in my hands and wept. Letting a useless wave of self pitty and loathing take me over. Tommy grabbed my wrist firmly but without any kind of cruelty, pulled my hands away to set them at my side, bent down and kissed me. One soft gentle kiss. I was so taken back by his act of mercy that I wrapped my hands around his head to prevent him from moving. He let me have my way but only briefly. Allowing me to part his lips and pressing his tongue back against mine tenderly. But then he pulled away, looked me straight in the eyes and said. "Now go back in there and find your pansy, I'm sure me must be missing you." I didn't assume anything kinder would come. The kiss in itself felt like some kind of prank. I walked away like he said back to the dinning room to find the usual lots gathered at their tables. Mike was harder to find than I had hopped for but that was only because he was where I was praying he wouldn't be. Right next to Paddy. I finished out the evening there glad that Tommy had left out the back. But every few minutes when I thought no one would notice my fingers made why way to my lips and the thought of that last kiss came back to me.


	3. Chapter 3

**Hey guys quick note: If you're reading it could you do something to let me know? If it doesn't have readers I wont keep transfering it over. Also there is no Beta so please forgive mistakes.**

**OH! And thank you to the one follower :-)**

**There are some intense triggers coming, not this chapter, but the next couple. Dubious consent, near rape. **

April 23rd

Tommy was at my door today. At about 10:30 I was finishing my dinner dishes when I heard a rapping at the door. Stepping as quietly as I could into the front room I pulled back the front window curtain just enough to see my guest. He held a paper bag and two small round glasses. Most likely a peace offering. Yet I didn't answer. Instead choosing to remain planted in my spot safe from view watching him. He knocked a second time adding my name and "Come on, I know your in there girlie." I nearly yielded to his call but just as I went to move he turned to leave. Spouting off something along the lines of I shouldn't have bothered. I don't know what I'm going to do Mike knows something is wrong. He asked me last night when we had finished why I seemed so far away. He has no idea anything has ever happened with Tommy. And if I tell him what went down and how it had, I know he'd never see me the same way. Everything just feels different now it's as if Tommy introduced me to apart of myself I didn't know was there. The part that's dark, the part that craves the beast he holds inside.

April 25th

I'm watching Tommy standing in my bedroom window as I write this. He's not here for an average sleep over; there will be no further contact this evening. He's here to in his own words "Make sure you don't do anything you'll regret." He says he doesn't need the "blood" on his hands during his training. I can't say I'm not glad in a way that he's here however. After what happened I don't want to be alone. Not that he is really the company I should be enjoying since it was in large part because of him, that I need (in his opinion) to be babysat. It began only hours before. I was doing laps at the health club, trying to work out some of the confusion I had been dealing with in the past days. When all the sudden there was a body in my way. I surfaced to find Tommy standing in the pool in front of me. "How are you in here, this is members only. You have to go." I couldn't look him in the eyes he'd see the lie in what I was saying. I was excited to see him standing there. I had been afraid that after the other night he would have given up. Even though nothing good had come out of everything that had gone down between the two of us I had spent the two previous evenings praying that wasn't the last I would be seeing him. And here he was looming in front of me plainly having something to say.  
"You've been avoiding me." I thought through my response not wanting to cause a scene. If we were caught here there would be no more hiding this from Mike. "I've been doing what I'm suppose to do and not acting like I'm free game." I was going to turn away and swim to the other side of the pool to get out. I wanted him here with everything inside me and I knew it wasn't right. "No, no, nu, no. Your not running away again this isn't Tommy chases Abbie then ends up bein da bad guy. We're having this out here and now." Wrapping both arms around my waist to keep me held in place he continued his point. "We had a good time in the church you can't say that ain't true. You also can't tell me your not at least at lil happy I'm here. I know how much of a fight you can put up when you want to and you're not moven. You want me here. Don't ya?" I had betrayed myself with my submission. And he had betrayed himself as well. He was trying to act like it wouldn't matter how I answered him, but the slight quiver in this voice as he asked for reassurance proved there were feelings involved. "Tommy this is wrong you being here, me wanting you here, it's just not okay. I have a boyfriend and he loves me." His head shot back then his expression shocked. "And he loves you?" I had slipped up and was caught. "Yes he does." I felt weary of where this was going. "Shouldn't that have been a And I love him? I mean you do love him don''t cha?" I couldn't believe what I had just said, without even knowing it I had given the answer I had been looking for since Sunday. "He loved me" that was all I said. And I loved him, I did. But I was more worried about whether or not I was going to hurt him in asking him to let me go than I was about the prospect of letting him go myself. "I..you should go. Please go." His hold didn't budge. "You didn't answer the question Abbie." I knew I hadn't. "I care about him Tommy, a lot. I have for a long time and I owe him better than this." His chest swelled behind me . It was obvious he assumed he had won. "That's not good enough, I'm not leaving this pool till you can look me in the eye and tell me you haven't wanted me." Not a word was spoken, I just looked back at him unable to lie.  
He moved his hands up my back till they covered my shoulder blades, leaning in close to me rubbing his nose against mine. "Hmm, your just as much mine as his girlie. And I Haven't been getting my fair share." The emotional soft Tommy was gone now. My animal was back. The creature he harbored inside, setting it loose only for his opponents and apparently myself. He licked my neck trailing the tip of his tongue upward then closing his lips onto my jaw line. I tried to close myself off pulling my arms together covering myself as much as I could. "Now now, don't play mean. You can have just as much fun with this as I'm going to. Just let go." There was a teasing in his voice he knew now how much he affected me. Apparently loosing the need to be easy with me, he wedged his hand between my arms separating them then putting them around his own waste with a smirk. I bent in towards his pecs giving up. I kissed him on the chest softly just testing his reaction. He didn't move so I looked at his face. he was staring down at me waiting it seemed for what I would do next. I kissed his neck nipping lightly then I moved myself more directly in front of him and began at his chest again. Rubbing my fingers through the hair on his chest gracing each spot with it's own attention. He pulled me back from cuffing is hand around the back of my head, "See, like I said before, not so terrible huh?" He slipped one hand under my top pinching my peek between his fingertips. Making me inhale sharply. I could feel his erection on my leg so I slid my hand slowly into his shorts. Taking him in hand I went to work. Stroking and teasing his tip. His free hand then made it's way between my thighs rubbing the outside of my bottoms. I paused what I was doing trying one last time to convince myself out of it. "Wait, I don't think we should." He sighed removing his hands from their places putting them on either one of my hips. "But we already are doll. There's no backing out, the cage is locked. It's submission or K.O. from here on out."  
He picked me up holding me at an even level. My legs wrapped around his waist reflexively. Laying his forehead on mine he pushed up with his midsection and ground his hard on against me. Grunting I pushed back working against him. "Babe get my shorts." It was an order he was not making a request. Getting what he wanted. What was; to him, rightfully his to take. Loosening the wet drawstring keeping his athletic sweats in place I moved the interfering layers from there home. His member sprang out egger to find freedom. I grabbed hold of him guiding past my bottoms pushing them aside to allow entrance. Feeling him fill me again it was as if I had waited years instead of just the few days since your last meeting. He nudged at my face with his chin until I looked up at him setting is forehead where it had been moved me up then back down over him with speed. I put my hands on his shoulders grasping tightly to them for support and started moving on my own. Keeping his pace I rode him. He growled deeply in my ear. "More." I quickened my motion slamming myself down on him crying out from the mix of sensations I was brought every time I was with him. "Not good enough." It was all he said then before I knew it he was pulling off. I whimpered as he put me back into the water. "I'm not done with you, come on."  
He brought me over to the edge of the pool and raised me out resting me on the tile. Climbing out he grabbed my arm "Com'er" Then he led me into the now closed spa room. Then looked around for a minute before continuing his quest. He pointed to a massage table. "There. Now." I didn't understand what he was asking. "Tommy that's to high and we're not gonna fit on top." A smile came to his face, not a smirk a full smile. "Good thing there's more than a few way's to get this done then ey girlie." He walked me over to the table turning me to face it as he set his stance. I bent myself slightly enabling him to position my body the rest of the way as needed. He came up close behind me as he bent himself over me flatting himself almost completely onto me. Rising up onto pads of his feet and pushed in. I let out an unchecked cry of bliss he groaned along with me. I have no idea what amount of time passed then as we let ourselves be at least for that flash of time, untamed. He pounded full force against me as I fell into the table while it rocked back and forth under me from the pressure of it all. "Tommy don't stop." The feeling of his stiff member pushing through my folds, stretching me perfectly was almost to my to compute. "Not for anything short of death babe." I buckled soon after my knees giving out as I flooded with pleasure. Glad that I had the table to hold me u as another orgasm followed quickly behind the first. A roar sounded from behind me as Tommy shuttered to a halt not moving once he collapsed over me.  
It was then that I realized something was wrong I felt an extra presence in doorway of the room. Fearing that an employee had found us I threw an elbow back into Tommy's side. "Ow! What da hell was dat for. Not like I was crushing the air outta ya." I nodded in the direction of our witness still unable to see who it was. "Uhh, hey there bud." His words weren't those one would speak to a random employee. At that instant I realized my worst fear had come true. I turned as Tommy lifted himself off of me to see Mike standing in the doorway looking devastated. We stared at each other for a long while until I started "Mike I," Stepping back he raised a hand to quiet me. "No, Abbie there is nothing for you to say. I knew you weren't telling me something and I guess he was it." I moved towards him. "Please just let me explain. I need you to understand." His expression was stone hard. "Understand what? That you're a whore?" The previously dormant Tommy, spoke now. "Ey bub, your not gonna use that tone with her ya hear me?" I was uneasy about them being in the same room certain that if neither left there would be blood. "Tommy I can handle this just please go wait outside." It appeared briefly that he was going to listen until Mike chimed in. "Yea why don't you leave so my girlfriend can explain to me why I just caught her fucking an asshole." Tommy reared back. "Who you callin an asshole? You don't know me." He made his way close to Mike. Still nude from our encounter. "Your dad told me quite a lot about you actually, about how you left him and let your mom die alone. About how you ran off to the Marines to escape having to face the fact that you're a worthless sack of shit." There was no stopping him Tommy charged plowing Mike down with a spine tingling thud to the ground. "Tommy NO! Get off him." He ceased, but the damage was done Mike had a bloody nose and at least one black eye. "Tommy just go! Go wait in the other room now." Pain suddenly flashed across his face and a hint of what could have been betrayal. "Your taking his side? Is that how this is gonna go?" He was like a child who had been told only one sibling was in trouble for a fight. "No, I'm not on anyone's side just go." He stormed out definitely not okay with being the one sent away. "Mike can you breath right? Where does it hurt." Turning away from me as I reached for him his eyes were hallow. "Fuck off. Go get me someone on the staff and leave me alone. I don't want you to touch me again don't even look at me. We are done." There was no fighting it he was right. I stood and left heading into the hallway to let the first person I saw know about Mike. Then I went back to find Tommy. He was dressed then having pulled my clothes out of there bag as well setting them out and ready.  
I dressed in silence hot tears streaming down my face. What had I done? This wasn't me I wasn't this person. In only a few weeks I had let myself do something with Tommy I swore I'd never do. I faced him. "You should go home. We'll talk tomorrow. I just can't do it tonight." I headed for the door. "I'm taking you home Abbie. No ifs or ands." Sighing I shook my head. "I'm really not in the mood Tommy my boyfriend just caught me fucking someone else then wouldn't even let me help him because he was so disgusted with me." He was next to me walking step for step. "Don't worry, I have no intension of touching ya. It was obvious when you sent me out I was unwanted." I didn't have the energy to correct him all I said was "There is so much you don't understand Tommy. You can come with me if you want we will talk in the morning. Just don't be angry with me I've got enough of that already." He stopped us. "I'm not taking you home to play house. There is nothing you need to explain to me. I just don't need ya doin anythin you'll regret and leaving blood on my hands tonight. So Ima watch you. That's all."  
And now here we are, Tommy has moved himself into my lazy boy and is watching me writing. I'm sitting in bed eyes sore from the last hour of crying into my pillow while he stared out the window. This was all at once the most arousing and painful day of my life.


	4. Chapter 4

April 26th

I woke up at around three this morning. Head pounding from all of the tears that were shed last night. Tommy was sitting just where I'd left him. One arm bent upward at the elbow holding his head up as he slept. By his breathing I guessed he had not been out very long so I did my best to make my way silently to the bathroom. I turned on the shower hoping the steam could help cure my pain also hoping to wash away the days chaos. I made the shower quick wanting to return to my bed and sleep as soon as possible. Taking two Tylenol I retreated back to my room. Tommy had shifted now crossing both arms and lying his head side ways on the cushion of the chair. He looked almost vulnerable. I moved closer to him studying the softness of his face when he wasn't holding it into a scowl or grimace. There must be people somewhere that know this Tommy. He has to have friends he can't treat everyone he has ever met like he owns them. I reached out cautiously brushing his hair with my finger then returned to bed.  
"Did you really think you were gonna get away with that?" The sound of his voice nearly sent me soaring to the other side of the room. "Get away with what touching you? I'm sorry am I only allowed to do that when you've told me to?" He sat up in the chair his face looking less aggressive than usual. "Nah, but why you sneaking? Normally I can't get you to admit you want me near you let alone touch me first." His had a valid point I wasn't exactly easy on him. Then again it was hard to reach for a man whom I knew would respond more with cruelty then affection. "Well there I touched you. Goodnight Tommy." He stood now coming to sit at the end of my bed. "Are you uh… Okay?" His concern was warming "I'm alright yes, it was going to happen for one reason or another. I was just trying not to have it be that." My voice was probabl to soft at the end. He nodded understandingly then remained where he was looking as if he was waiting for something. I noticed him looking at the large empty space on my queen sized mattress. "Would you be more comfortable here Tommy? You don't have to stay in the chair. You don't need to have all those layers on either I'm sure you don't leave them on at home." He rose up and removed a few layers leaving his shorts and tank then got into the bed. Climbing over me to the space he had been eyeballing. "Can I ask you something Tommy?" Turning his head on the pillow to meet my eyes he let out a cautious grunt. "Don't push it but yes. I guess." The question had been on my mind since it had happened. "Why were you at my door the other day?" He turned totally on to his side and looked at me knowingly. "So you were hidin ey, I donno I was bored. Paddy had disappeared so I was free to do what I wanted and I figured maybe you'd be game." I dug through the answer finding what I had been searching for, "So you could have done whatever you wanted and you came here?" He cocked his brow attempting to undermined the statement. "Don't get all freaked out on me it was a whim okay." I rolled over to my side looking towards the door and settled in to doze off. Unexpectedly Tommy came up against me lying an arm over my waist and pressing himself on the full length of my body. For a moment I thought he was being a normal guy until I felt the extra bulge against my back. "Is there something I could help you with back there?" He didn't respond verbally instead he laid flat on his back and pulled me so that I was lying on his chest. I leaned up to test the waters and attempted to kiss him. He didn't move away but lacked enthusiasm in his return so I assumed it was not going to be a tender tumble not that it had ever been.  
He made no moves towards me letting me be my own guide for the first time. I debated things I had wanted to do to him in times past making up my mind where start. I owed him a favor he had graciously bestowed upon me in the church that I had, up until this point been unable to repay. I kissed his chest through his tank making my way down his abdomen to his hemline. Running my tongue along the whole of it barley making contact. He inhaled sharply as I pulled down the his shorts revealing my destination. Taking him by the base I moved myself over his erection and lowered my lips to his pink tip. Wetting them with my tongue I place them around the head suckling it for a period letting the excess roll down to my hand which began working the shaft. he pushed lightly towards my face letting me know he was in need of more. I lowered myself completely taking in as much of him as I could bobbing up then back down for a better taste. He grumbled and groaned digging his fists into the sheets around him. I could see his knuckles turning white and was proud of what I was accomplishing. I worked faster fighting further down with every intake until I felt him hit my throat. I gagged slightly the sound bringing him obvious pleasure as the words "Dear god girlie" came flowing from his lips. He put his fingers through my hair and held tight as I continued to devour him. Wanting to finish him here giving a fair trade for what was done days before hand I was surprised when he spoke up.  
"Come here." I slowed to a stop and looked up at him. "What?" He sat himself up removing his shirt "Get up here." I crawled back up him straddling his waist as he took off the tank top I was wearing. He bent his neck and moved towards me taking my breast into his mouth. He began copying the motions I had been using, rolling his tongue around my areola suckling with force at my bead. I grabbed his hair and let out a sigh. "I want to be inside you." Was all he said and I discarded my bottoms climbing back onto him I steadied myself and glided onto him. He made no move to set my pace allowing me to grind slowly and enjoy him. I could feel him better now not just inside of me but outside as well. The muscles of his back and the strength in his hands that was lost to the intensity of our pervious encounters. He kissed at my neck and chest nipping and licking never to roughly. I leaned back making my angle to him more direct holding his biceps for support. Thrusting myself quicker I moaned unashamed. He placed his hands on my hips, helping hold them in place as I was speeding up growling and grunting. I sat up close again keeping the quickened pace and whispered in his ear. "Tell me what you need Tommy." His head was burrowed into my neck and I heard him say. "You, just you." I was positive that though he was speaking out loud I wasn't suppose to hear what he had said. "What?" He looked directly in my eyes. "You know what your doing babe." I let him in deeper filling me completely and leaned back again. In seconds we were both shuttering in unison bellowing cry's of ecstasy to the heavens.  
I slid off of him and resumed my spot on the bed lying on my side. He joined me taking his earlier post as well and placed his lips on the back of my neck. "Are ya happy Abbie? Did that make you happy?" It had. I was feeling joyful for the first time since meeting Tommy. "Yes, it really did." He chuckled slightly sounding light hearted. "Good, because it's never happening like that again." With that he kissed the back of my neck and tucked himself against me ready to fall asleep.  
I drifted away feeling as I usually did after a night with Tommy. Used. I should have anticipated some sort of negative reaction to what had happened. He had never been sweet or delicate before why would he start now. Well I was done. No more. I woke up at six feeling the need to solve my issue quickly. I got dressed and went to the Health Club leaving him a note not saying where I'd gone only…

Tommy,  
The door and my legs are closed until you figure out how to treat me like a human.

Fuck off,  
Abbie

March 9th

I hadn't seen Tommy in almost two weeks before last night. He showed up at my door at around 5 nearly knocking it in. "What Tommy? I have cleaning to get done." He looked at me unconvinced knowing I was pulling a reason not to be available out of thin air. "Get something decent on you got and hour." I just stared at him not sure whether he was being serious. "Abbie, GO get dressed. You now have 59 minutes." Uncertainty stained my face and it was clear he had no time for dealing with me. "What am I getting dressed for." He began ushering me into my room as he gave me my reason. "I have some publicity fight tonight Paddy set up. You said you want to be treated human; you are my plus one. Put a fucking dress on and lets go." I was stunned, was he taking me on a date… to watch him fight?  
When we arrived Paddy was already there he didn't recognize me outside of my Sunday's best and when Tommy said "Paddy you get that ticket." He looked at me for a long while before bursting. "Abbie? Why hello darling, what are you doing here with Tommy, a..are you the plus one ticket he asked for?" Paddy had up until now no knowledge of me and Tommy's escapades so the sight of me walking close with his son's arm round my waist must have been a shock. "Yep, I guess so, or at least that's what I've been told I am." Paddy looked confused. "Told you were?" Tommy cut off our conversation there. "Just give her da damn ticket so I can go get ready for fucks sake." At that they departed leaving me in the hands of a cage-side usher. It was about an hour of standing alone before the fight started, which wasn't so bad considering it lasted all of three seconds. I honestly think I've seen Tommy sweatier after one of our trysts than he was when he left the cage. He went straight to the back. I was lead through a tunnel into a room that looked to be set for an after party "She is Riordan's plus one. Show her where to go." I was passed to my next guide who took me through the party room down other hall in the direction we had already came from. "Mr. Riordan asked that you be brought back to the locker room after the fight." We stopped in front of the door. I pushed it open hearing the sound of feminine giggles trailing out. "Oh Abbie, I forgot I asked for you." There on the ground in front of Tommy knelt a sign girl obviously ready to start giving him his reward. "That's awesome Tommy, is this me learning my lesson? I told you no sex so you pretend to take me on a date so you can break my heart? Well to bad for you cuz I don't give a shit. I'll be back home doing my cleaning. Goodbye." I honestly didn't feel anything the depth of his plot had me in shocked. I was just about to the door and he spoke up. "Stop now! Turn' round and come here." I stopped and turned but didn't take a step towards him. "I said come're Abbie. And you! What da fuck are you still doin here?" The last line was aimed at the poor woman standing motionless to the side of him. She hurried past me and out the door not letting out a peep. I remained in my place.  
"Your not going to act like you just did then expect to tell me what to do Tommy Riordan, I'm not your dog." He got up off the bench and moved towards me. "You are what I say you are now get over here. I deserve a prize and your gonna give it to me." I stood strong. "Get bent." As I turned to leave I was met by Paddy standing just outside the door jaw about on the ground. "Abbie honey go enjoy the party we will be there in a moment." All I heard as I walked away was Paddy's voice bellowing "Who in God's name do you think you are son. When did you become this man?"  
I was having a decent time at the party to my surprise. Mingling and enjoying the free booze. Until I saw Tommy emerging from the locker room and head towards me. The next hour was spent in awkward silence neither of us acknowledging the other. Finally I had had enough. I started toward the exit as fast as I could without running. I didn't get far though. "And where. Pray tell, are you going girlie." Busted. "Home. You're not talking to me and I'm certainly not needed so I'm gonna leave." His next move still amazes me. He put his arm around my waist lead me over to an area that had crescent booths arranged in to makeshift VIP tables. Sat on the edge of one then placed me in his lap. Once he had me properly set he started conversation with a lower level fighter near by. Asking about the style of this or that fighter all the while rubbing my knee with the tips of his fingers. I didn't really know what to do and was relived when Paddy walked up to me holding out a drink. "Just a coke I'm afraid. Can't even order a drink; don't trust myself." I thanked him with a smile, "So you and Tommy huh? How.. um is that?" I let out a deep sigh. "I'll tell you when I know what it is." Paddy looked worried "Does he treat you alright? I mean like a guy should treat his gal?" As I went to answer dishonestly I was spoken for. "I don beat'er if dat's what your askin old man." Tommy straightened in his seat. "And I donno if it's your place to be pressin since your past ins't exactly golden now is it." Paddy looked at Tommy seemingly convinced that whatever talk they had earlier had no affect on him. Not knowing that there were miles of progress even in the way we were touching now. "I was just being curious no need to get angry. I'll leave. Have a lovely evening Abbie." "You too Paddy try and have some fun." With that I was silent and forgotten again.  
About another forty minutes of not being spoken to and I declared it unbearable. I excused myself to the washroom and left. I had been at home about thirty minutes and had really started to wonder if I should have left sooner. He didn't seem to care I was gone. There was no sign of him until the door opened with a bang while I was sorting my laundry. "Where the hell are ya girlie." He was in a rage the tone in his voice clearly tip towing uncontrolled. "Laundry." Was all I said and in seconds he was standing behind me. "What nerve you have all da sudden. Just leaving me there lookin like a damn'd fool while you sit here folding your whites." I paid no mind to him or the close proximity of him to me. "Now your gonna have attitude? You stayed when the ring slut was gonna blow me but I spend time talking to someone that's not you and now ya have a fit." That bit hard. He was right maybe it was too little to late. But that just proved what I had feared since getting in the taxi not an hour before. Tommy had some kind of unwelcome control over me. "Get out. I never told you that you could come in you're breaking and entering." He laughed at me and lifted me onto the dryer. "Make me brat. You're eating dinner. Now." He walked towards the kitchen. I noted for the first time the smell of Chinese takeout. There were three brown paper bags all full of food was he feeding us or an army? "What is all this?" I was awe struck to say the least. "You left before they served so I brought you food." He had brought me a small Chinese kitchens worth of food. "This is all for me? Alone?" He looked aggravated at best. "I didn't know what you ate. Just pick something already." I did as he sort asked and plated myself a helping of orange chicken and fried rice. Eating while he watched cars through my kitchen window I tried to find my next words. "Thank you Tommy. This was surprising, and sweet. I'm sorry I left like I did. Not sorry that I left though." He seemed unamused and gave me simply an agitated glance. I finished and put my plate in the sink. Turning to thank him again I was caught of guard by his lips on mine. I gave in a bit enjoying the taste of him, cigarettes, mint, and whisky. He meant business reaching his hands down to my backside grabbing firmly. I backed away, "Do you really think a fake date and Chinese food are the key to opening shop again? Cuz if you do your insane." His nostrils flared out with tension. "Oh fuck no. You are not getting out of this with one of your tantrums. You were wide open when you barely new me, or while you had a boyfriend, but not on the first date? NOT HAPPENING." I had no memory of being wide open for him the first time. Or making the second particularly easy either so I walked away making it to my living room before my feet left the ground.  
He threw me on my couch and removed his shirt. "Tommy what your doing right now, it's called rape, are you really a rapist?" He stopped for a brief moment before leaning over me. "Wasn't rape the first time, in fact I member you having a happy ending same as me." How dare he, "I left in tears Tommy, IN TEARS!" He was unscathed by the comment as he leaned in and began kissing my neck and shoulders. Laying himself completely on top of me so that I was unable to move. He reached an arm up my shirt taking my breast into his fist squeezing roughly. "None of this feels good Tommy, what are you doing." My voice was horse from trying to fend of tears. He sat slightly up eyes a mixture of lingering rage and carnal need. "Relax and you'll feel fine. I'm not trying to hurt you but your fighting to hard." Fighting to hard I was in the wrong again. It was as if the violence Tommy swallowed himself in kept him from seeing what he was trying to do. "Yea I'm fighting because I said no." Face still blank he replied in a flat tone. "Well I'm not excepting no. It's been two weeks since I've had any and if I want it I know you do." He came down on me again pulling my shirt over my head lowering his face to my breast. He licked and nipped taking it almost fully at some points into his mouth. I couldn't help myself but to let out a sigh. He took that as some sort of permission because he then pulled back again standing to remove his pants and mine. "Tommy I never said YES!" No words again as he lowered himself and entered me. I grunted in pain. I wasn't unprepared for him to be inside of me. My body responded to him exactly how he needed, the pain was from the knowledge that I had no choice in the matter this was happening.  
He rammed hard into me. Letting me know I had been wrong to leave him and that I would never do it again. The harsh thud of contact between his body and mine was the only sound besides his grunts. I was doing all I could not to show him that I liked it loved it even. Feeling him rocking into me so deeply I could hardly stand it. Then all of the sudden he stopped, "Your just gonna hate it da whole time? It's already happening Abbie just give it a go for Christ's sake." I wouldn't look at him so he cupped my neck and turned me towards him forcing eye contact. He began moving again still hard but with less speed making it easier to tolerate. After a few minutes my body relaxed and I was showing signs of pleasure digging my nails into his arms to the point of pain. I moaned still finding guilty pleasure in his aggression. My stomach turning with a mix of passion and self loathing. He pressed his cheek to mine and growled deeply. "Say your mine." His words were hard and demanding as if he gained no pleasure from the statement. He nearly needed me to submit to my lesson. When I failed to do as he told me he repeated himself this time with a minutely gentler tone. "Abbie, tell me that you belong with me." He was right. What else explained it why else would I find so much pleasure in the brutality of his actions if our bodies weren't meant to be connected. "You win Tommy. I'm done fighting." He kissed my shoulder and wrapped his arms fully around my torso encompassing me completely in his grasp. Hammering into me through it all. I belted out one last gleeful tone before I fell apart in his arms. He came to a halt soon after nearly taking the air out of me when he tightened even further around my body.  
For a time there was no motion the two of us stayed where we were while no words spoken. Then as quickly as the had thrown he into my spot Tommy lifted me up and carried me to the bedroom. Lying me in the same slot I held last time we shared my bed he laid himself at my side shifting until he was as close to me as was possible. Taking me in his arms again he rested his head on the pillow behind me and grazed the back of my shoulder with his nose. "Goodnight Abbie, I'm…." His voice broke. "Try and get some sleep." I didn't want to say anything afraid tears would rise up if I let myself think enough to formulate the sentence. Instead I laced my arms into his as they were secured around me and fell asleep.


	5. Chapter 5

May 10th

I had a terrible dream that night. Not about Tommy or our ordeal, but about my mother. She missed a meeting and when I went to find out why I found her laying on the floor in her apartment. She had fallen of the wagon and was passed out in a pool of her own vomit. I picked her up and took her into the bathroom cleaning her up the way I hadn't had to since being in high school. All the while she fought and cursed telling me how useless I was and that I would never amount to anything in her life time, that I was an embarrassment. When I woke up I felt at best vulnerable and at the worst nauseas. I rolled over needing the sight of Tommy's face just something to remind me that what I had dreamt wasn't real, but he wasn't there. I looked around finding that his cloths were all missing from the ground so I assumed he had left. Standing I made my way towards the bathroom as I reached out for the handle I was startled when it turn on it's own. Tommy stepped out from behind it fully clothed trying his hair in one of my freshly cleaned towels. "I thought you had left." He walked into my room picking up his shoes that had been set neatly next to my arm chair. Shoes I had failed to notice in the survey of my room earlier. "I'm just about to." He seemed calm as if noting had happened the night before as if there was no need for tension. "Where are you going." He looked directly at me for the first time that morning. "Training, Paddy's gonna give me the what for. I'm already late." There was suspicion in his tone it was clear he was weary about my sudden interest in what he did. "Do you train every day? "I was doing my best to hint towards him staying without actually having to ask; being alone after my dream just seemed daunting. "Yea, everyday from dawn until dusk. Cept Sundays, Paddy cuts off Sundays to make his stupid meetins." I tried to pick my words carefully not wanting to completely give myself away just yet. "And you've never slipped a day? Never taken a personal?" He stood now and turned to face me fully. "No. Nothens been worth the hacklin the old man would give me." I was clearly going to have to be blunt with him. "But if something was worth it would you skip?" He looked lost and unsure of what to say back. "What are you getting at Abbie?" I drew in a deep breath before I went on. "If I asked you to stay. If I wanted you here, then would you skip?" I was looking at the ground far to embarrassed to be asking this of him after the previous evenings tussle. "Okay, da fuck is goin on here Abbie?! Last night I was," he lifted his fingers and made imaginary parentheses around the next word, "rapin you. Today ya don't want me to leave. Ya said I was treatin you like shit you need ta make up your damned mind." Taking in another large gulp of air I went for it. "Tommy I would like it if you stayed with me." Meeting his eyes near desperately. "I need you to stay with me."

He pulled back in shock. "You need me to stay?" Now he was rubbing it in. I knew he would I had just hopped I'd be wrong. "Yes Tommy Riordan, I need you. So, sit in the chair and ignore me, punch my walls for practice, or fuck me till I cry just don't leave. Please." His mouth dropped as he took in what I had just promised. "Say that last bit again girlie." I smiled at him, "You heard me sir. Pound me as hard as you want, flip me over, throw me into the goddamn wall. Just don't leave me." He didn't move aside from recoiling his head a bit further. "Have I lost my mind, are we still asleep? What happened to you between me getting in the shower and now that your all the sudden hoped on team Tommy?" I gave him an annoyed look. "I've been on team Tommy quite some time now. In case you didn't notice by the large amount of time we've spent around each other in the nude. I'm just not always on team Tommy's games and bullshit. But today I don't care. I just don't want to be alone." He rolled it over in his mind taking a few minutes to process the information. "I'm gonna go take a shower myself . If your still here when I get out I'll assume that means your skipping training for the day." I walked into the bathroom adding a little extra swivel to my step hoping it would help convince him to stay.

As I heated up the water and undressed I could hear him in my room mumbling to himself probably still in some minor state of amazement over what had just happened. I stepped into the shower and began washing my hair hoping that when I returned to my room he would be there waiting. I didn't have to wonder for long though because after a few short minutes the door opened followed by the curtain to the shower. Tommy stepped in fully naked and seemingly ready to go. "You already had your shower Mr. Man and patience is a virtue." He chuckled placing a hand on the tile to either side of my head. "Yea well there's no sayen you weren't gonna get out this shower and have your mind changed." It felt good to know he was so excited to be spending time with me. Even if it was just because I had promised him anything he wanted. A promise I was afraid I'd live to regret in some way. "Well then maybe you should do your best to make sure I don't." He smile grew even larger. It wasn't something I was accustomed to; seeing Tommy happy, but I loved it. I truly adored the look in his eyes. "Well lets get to it then." He bent down lips meeting mine greedily. Parting them he nearly chocked me with his tongue as he shoved it roughly into my mouth. Even when I wasn't fighting Tommy was aggressive. He didn't know any other way. I brushed my tongue back against his. Suckling on it letting up only to place not so gentle bites on his bottom lip. He backed us into the wall of the shower water dripping off his head as he stood almost directly under the spout. Trailing a hand up both my legs he grabbed on and scooted me up the tile until I was where he needed me never breaking the bond between our mouths. He didn't push himself in right away, instead he slid his erection back and fourth in the crevasse in between my legs. Rubbing with force hitting every spot precisely where I needed. I tried to ease the weight of my body by curling my arms under his and around his massive shoulders. He didn't seem to need the help though since the distribution of my weight never changed. He continued his slightly teasing application of pleasure as I rested my head against the tile behind me letting out a melody of moans and sights. Saying in a tone resembling a starved beggar. "I want you inside of me Tommy." He didn't think twice before doing as I pleaded pushing himself into me full throttle, not letting up as he settled into his rhythm. I kissed and bit his neck and collar leaving marks that wouldn't fade within the day. moving myself in sync with his movement. It had never been like this for us before so in unison. When he had let me take control he had held his hips almost motionless against mine and no matter how much I tried I could never match the ferocity of his body beating into mine all on earlier occasions.

He glided his hands further up my thighs holding onto my bottom as he pushed in deeper filling me with every available inch. I cried out in glee wrapping my hand around the back of his head taking a handful of hair. He grunted and groaned pressing his lips every now and then against my temple or shoulder whichever was nearer his lips. "Fuck Tommy! Why didn't you tell me you could be so agreeable?" He said nothing back only tighten his grasp on my rear quickening himself. I was close to the edge now feeling my stomach start to flutter I dug my self into his back feeling the skin break under my nails. Before I had a chance to sound out Tommy covered my mouth with his swallowing my bellows and he quivered to a stop. He stepped back looking me in the eyes. "Still want me to hang around then girlie.?" He couldn't let there be even one delicate moment between us. "Yea I guess you can stay." He left then and I finished up my shower suddenly feeling my stomach growl.

As I returned to my room I saw that Tommy had not completely redressed himself. Instead he sat thumbing through the news paper in his jeans from the party the night before. "So what now?" It was a good question. I hadn't ever thought about what I would do with Tommy if he spent a real day together. I didn't know that he did anything except fight or mess with me. "Well first I need breakfast so I'll assume you do to. And then I have no idea, what is it that you do with your free time?" He thought for a second looked as if he was going to give me an answer then went back to thinking again. "I'm not sure, train I guess just on my own instead of with Paddy." I shrugged figuring his answer would be something along these lines. "Well I'm sure we will find something to kill the time." I headed into the kitchen and poured myself a bowl of cereal. "I have egg whites in the fridge and the pans are in that cabinet there if you'd like. If not the cereal is an open option too." He opted for the cereal pouring himself a rather hardy portion into one of my salad bowls. "Sure go ahead. You can have the rest of the box. I wasn't gonna eat it or anything." He looked up from his feast. "Sorry I don't eat bird sized helpins like you do. Maybe if you ate a little more you wouldn't be so pissy all the time huh." Why did he have to make everything so personal. "I wasn't being serious jerk off. However, I can see you lack in a sense of humor so I'll leave wit out of our conversations from here on out." My eyes rolled back as I started in my on my cereal with a vengeance. "Oh I have a great sense of humor, you're just not fucken funny." I was regretting my decision already. I set my half eaten bowl in the sink and walked over to the table intending on checking up on my emails and sending my mom a line. Just to make sure she was alright. "What now your gonna sit ter and pout jus cuz I don't find your bitchy so called humor amusing?" I huffed and continued logging on. Ignoring him as he moved across the room and leaned against the table next to my chair. "Abbbiieee." He rang out sarcastically. "Come on now. We've been haven an ok time. Don't mess it up." Again I merely huffed not giving him the effort of an upward glance or verbal acknowledgement. "Hey! I'm bout to catch a world of hell for flaking out on Paddy to stay here. Which you asked me to do, so don't sit there on your high horse an pretend I ain't standing next to ya." I looked up then feeling slightly guilty. "I'm not messing anything up. You are with your constant need to make everything into an argument." He grabbed the arm of my chair and spun it out from under the table till I was completely forward. The he leaned down and started kissing on the base of my neck trailing his tongue to my earlobe sucking it for a moment before making his way to my lips. I still wasn't quite attune to the idea of him kissing me like this and every time he did I feared a repercussion of some sort. I kissed back though wanting to make the most of what I was given. Lacing my fingers back into his thick hair as I parted my lips on his.

He didn't give me a chance to do anything else and before I knew it I was on the edge of the table with him nearly ripping my tank in two as he pulled it over my head. He pressed himself against me grabbing again at my backside and pushing his already engorged member against my middle. I gasped not expecting to find him so ready for action tjis quickly but his speed didn't stop there. In an instant he was pulling of my leggings and started at his own buttons. I came down from the table and stopped his hands where they were, "Oh what now woman, what in gods name is wrong now." I laughed to myself enjoying his momentary panic. "Nothing is wrong Tommy but I'd like to be the one undressing you for once." I unfastened his button and pulled down the zipper. Then tucking only the tips of my fingers into his jeans I lowered them to the floor slowly kneeling with them as they fell. I kissed my way back up his abdomen stopping to run my tongue along his belly button and then again once around each nipple before I pressed my lips to his. Running his fingers through my hair he wrapped one arm around my waist and turned me so that I was facing the table. Bending me onto it he leaned over me as he had before only this time the high of our support made it much easier for him to slip inside me and get to work. He had one arm completely around my waist just under my breast and used it as leverage more pulling me onto him then pushing himself into me. I groaned with pleasure loving the feel of him taking control. He pumped into me, the thickness of his member still stretching me even after I had had him just an hour ago. Then while still pulling me down the force of our collision made the same thudding crack it had the night before only this time instead of bringing me shame it brought me copious amounts of ecstasy. I reached out my arms trying to find something, anything to grab onto settling for the edge of the table. Digging my fingertips into the wood. The words I spoke next were not meant to be heard aloud but were instead a thought that escaped my lips ."Nothing should be able to feel this good." I was glad to be facing away from him or else he would see the bright read coloring of my cheeks. He laughed laying himself flatter onto me as he spoke into me ear. "See what happens when you let yourself get what you want babe." He picked me up holding me so my feet were completely off the floor and slid me further up the table leaving only my legs off the side. My body no longer needing support. He slammed into me harder moving the table under me so much I feared the legs would give out. I bubbled over at last making no sounds as my throat was near raw from abuse I only laid there body twitching and immobile. Thankfully he finished just after letting out his roar of passion falling on top of me.

We parted and began to replace our clothing as it had started I felt the need to make some sort of comment. Llet him know I was glad he had stayed. I was an idiot. "This is nice Tommy. I like having you here when we aren't fighting. It should happen more often." At that he stopped. Looking up at me from the chair he now occupied he gave a blunt reply, "Girlie I'm not sure what ya thought was goin on here but I'm not your boyfriend." I said nothing unsure of an appropriate response. I had known Tommy was not actually attached to me in any labeled fashion. But I had still assumed that there was at least enough care between us to openly enjoy each other company. "Look this has been alright and it was fine for a day but it's not how this is gonna keep goin. I told you already we ain't gonna be in any sorta relationship." I couldn't believe what I was hearing yet again. "After all that yesterday with you telling me to say I belonged with you. This is nothing?" He looked almost shy now. "Abbie when I told you to… well you know sometimes… you can't take pillow talk as serious conversation girlie." Bullshit. He was burying yet another moment in the prison in his mind. That wasn't just any regular pillow talk. It couldn't have been. "Really? That is what your gonna do? Retreat back into your cave of emotionless existence." He walked through the living room as I followed then into the bedroom and started to put on his tops. "I'm gonna go get some training in so I haven't wasted the whole day. Maybe I'll come by later and say G'nite. I don't think I should sleep over anymore. I'm afraid it's given you the wrong ideas." That said he walked past me stopping to brush my cheek with a peck and walked out the door.


End file.
